Tuesday, August 19, 2008

To Fish

Dear Fish,

Why did you let me go? Can it ever be the same, again? If you'd just try to reach me, I'd be so happy. Just one little phone call would do, but you don't do things like that, do you?

OK, if I stayed with you, it would have been wrong. I had to come back for Jane. I did. Its an awful thing I've done. And I'm wondering how could you love me. Maybe you never did. Maybe you thought you did.

Why is this so hard?

I don't want to have the baby now. You're not here. I just don't know if I can go on.

Of course, I haven't even seen Jane yet. All I've wanted to do since I got back is sleep. I have no energy. And it freaks me every-time I wake up. What have I done? Leaving you. If only you were here, things might be different.

How can I ever get you back? Will I ever see you again? I don't even have your picture. Why didn't we ever get our picture taken? All these things mean so much to me now. I never thought it would happen.

But it has. I can't fall out of love with you. I wish I could. But I can't. You're the only thing on my mind. You're the only one who kept me going.

Please read this. Pick up your damn mail before its too late, and read this.

Love Always,

B.

9 comments:

Cate said...

wow, now i've been away for a month i'll start reading up on the chapters i've missed... this will take some time, i think i'll print them out. i really like it that you have photos of bella and gordy in your sidebar. how about writing the names of the characters on the pictures in your header?

UmassSlytherin said...

oh, bella, get a grip, you poor girl! :(

I hope bella pulls it together soon!

I love the letters, you should do more of those, they're very well-written! :)

ellie said...

Oh that Bella...I liked that part..pick up your mail, etc.

simon n josh said...

Fish, you better wake up.

taffy. said...

aww, i hope he appreciates the honesty.
since all he seems to do is hide.

montypython101 said...

cool letters. FISH, U THERE?? haha, hopefully bella will hold it together.

em the skerry person grr said...

yeah andrew might just be mad if he ever finds out about that and thanks for reading

Liz said...

Poor B...

autumn said...

oh goodness. why is everything so sad? =[[