Saturday, June 28, 2008

between the scars

Emily didn't like what was happening. Didn't like the questions. She didn't like the pills. And she didn't know why they wanted to do this to her.

Especially, her parents. They wouldn't change. She just wanted to be left alone. Alone.

Except for Rosco. She knew she'd hurt him the most. Pulling that stunt with the Benadryl. She was sure she could never face him, again.

"I just don't want him seeing me helpless, you know." That was the answer she gave to the doctor when she asked about how she felt about Rosco now. So many questions about Rosco. Did he really deserve that many?

She squirmed every time the doctor brought up his name. Had he treated her badly? Was he abusive? Had he hurt her? It was so annoying to listen to those questions.

"No." Emily kept saying. She kept saying it to herself long after when she was home. Alone.

Her nerves jumped as if she was about to fall from a tight rope. She had to stop thinking about all of this. She had to put the pills away. They were doing no good. That's when she decided it was time to be someone else.

So what if she lied to strangers. They'd never know the difference. Maybe if she lied to herself long enough, she wouldn't know the difference, either.

And thats when it started. Sneaking out. Posing like a scene queen. She had the hair. She had the look. Maybe if she hung out in the right places, she wouldn't even be around here long. She'd find another life somewhere where she wasn't in the shadow of her sister. Somewhere where she didn't know Gordy's name or what he looked like.

She remembered the night she saw Rosco at the Whitfield. But all she could see was Gordy's face when he was walking toward her. It might have hurt, what he saw, but she knew it would hurt him worse if he knew how she felt about Gordy.


Cate said...

poor, poor emily. i so understand her. it breaks my heart reading about her, especially about how she feels for gordy *sniff*

ellie said...

I hope emily can come to terms with everything and move on.

Cady Lola Cep said...

Sort of reminds me of something House said once:

"Dealing with it by not dealing with it."

madalena said...

I love this :

"So what if she lied to strangers. They'd never know the difference.Maybe if she lied to herself long enough, she wouldn't know the difference, either."

It's so real !

I'm back on my blog ;]


madalena said...

could you explain me the sence of quirky things :s 'cause I don't undersatnd quirky so can't ut your tagg on my blog!!

Thanks ;]

Cate said...

i can't wait to hear more about emily! i'm concerned about her.

autumn said...

so that's what's happening to Emily. aw. poor her.

Liz said...

Poor emily. :/
And Rosco, will it ever work out between the two of them?


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