The best idea Emily had in mind was breakup sex, but it was hard to distinguish that with makeup sex because she knew that's what Derrick thought it was in her bed.
She was a little nervous about this. OK, a lot. Not so much the sex, but afterwards. After all, she was sure he'd only meant to slap some sense into her and really she was so much over him. Maybe Crystal wasn't. It wasn't like Crystal had exactly explained this to her.
But this was getting to her. These disappearing acts. Fading to black. Coming back to reality like a cannon ball.
"I think we're done." The words seemed slow to registor with Derrick who hadn't exactly came unglued yet. He looked more or less asleep.
"What?" He awoke then to her words.
"Yeah, this whole thing. Its a mess." She shook her head, no. "I'm a mess. Crystal's a mess. She'd really be so mad at me." Emily kind of giggled then. "That I slept with you and I only did it because of who she slept with. Hopefully, we're even now. You know. You should move on."
"What are you talking about? You are Crystal?" He rose up on his elbows then watching her get dressed.
"No. No I'm not." Emily shook her head, no. "I'm still in high school. Crystal's not."
"Who are you?"
"Emily," she said. "And I really want my senior year to work, and it won't if you're around. It will completely not work, at all. You should mingle more, you know. Maybe hook up with that Carrie girl, you know, you've seen her enough. You say she's talented and all. Why don't you do what ever it is you record guys do."
"You are totally warped." He got up then still undressed, pointing a finger at her. He made one of his silly screamo faces and shot her the finger then. Emily just rolled her eyes and shook her head, no.
"I know. I really need someone different. Or no one at all. Thats the way it should be. No one, but I'm really not very good being alone. Completely. But you," Emily nodded. "You have to go."
She was sure Derrick would never get it. He just didn't get it. He looked confused. Although, he didn't have any tricks of pulling her hair or leaving marks on her arm. He looked as if he didn't know what to do.
Emily stared back as he dressed. Yes, he was pretty, but was that ever enough?