Saturday, August 22, 2009

the pain of things

"Mom, you're freaking me out here," Bella looked at her mother thinking somehow things were reversed. Well, sort of. Was she really telling her the truth?

"I just knew, I knew ...knew it would be cancer because I've heard people say that. How it can happen... Or you know, Oh, you finally hit menopause. Just what you've been waiting for. God, I dunno what to do." She was crying and pacing about in the livingroom.

"Mom, you'll be fine. I know you will. You're one of the strongest people I know. You really are. I think what you went through with Dad. And us. You can get through this too." Her Mom gave her a hug then. It was so awkward. Bella never thought she'd be standing here doing this with her mother of all things.

Her mother couldn't say anything, but cry more as they hugged. So they stayed that way until Gib cried for her, and she had to go and see what he was up too with all the pots and pans in the kitchen. She had to watch him like a hawk, lately.

"See, you don't have this to put up with every second of the day," Bella said as she went to make sure nothing was in his mouth. "He wants to stay outside all the time. Nap time can't come soon enough."

"Parker is just beside himself," she sniffed. "He would have to be there when the doctor talked to me. Us. God." She shook her head. "All this premenopausal crap. God, all my friends not having a period like zero and me, I felt like I was having more of them, you know, even though they kept telling me I wasn't and now this is just perfectly fine. I'm perfectly fine." She sounded as if they'd been wrong.

"Well, I know Parker is far more supportive than Dad ever way. You'll probably have the best time of your life. You know that. The best." Bella remained upbeat, but she knew her Mom was really sad at the thought of having a baby she would never probably watch grow up to see him or her start a family of their own.

"I guess." She sat down and hugged herself. "I remember when you got pregnant with Jane, I thought I might be pregnant too. Until my period came. Oh, I'd had this dream though, that in fact I was going to carry her for nine months for you because I didn't want you to have to go through the pain of child birth." Her mother looked up at her.

"Look at me now," Bella smiled. "I loved child birth so much I'm on my third one." Of course, she was already for a scheduled surgery in late October to have the baby.

Bella looked at her mother's face. She was trying to imagine the whole child birth process. Bella laughed. She'd forgot. Hadn't she?


aiLee920 said...

hello there,,,
what a good post...
two thumbs up!

simon n josh said...

Well, that's exciting. I think Bella might be more caring than she knows.

diane said...

Kat's healthy, she'll do just fine and live a long time. Bella is beyond great in this. It's always the b*tchiest ones that make the strongest allies.

Raigan said...

This happens so much these days. Mothers of older children having babies i mean. It's like not uncommon at all, which in a way is pretty cool. My friends mom has a 20 year old, a 14 year old, a 2 year old, and a baby whos like on the verge of 1. And another friend of mines mom has an 18 year old, 15 year old, and 4 months old.

And of course my mom has a 14 year old, a 1 year old, and a bun in the oven haha

i love how the story is coming along :)


diane said...

I can't believe I forgot to mention how much I love your new header. Inspiration for a wedding dress maybe?

ellie said...

I was so not expecting that.